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Welcome to my website and I believe and advocate we can build strong relationships in spite of the pressures and distractions of modern living. 

Relationships are under a lot of pressure today, for all manner of reasons and it seems to be getting worse as time progresses. This statement is probably not what you want to hear especially on a home page of your first visit to this website. 

I have a question for you to ponder: do you wonder about the divorce rate statistics and why marriages last such a short time? I have for a long time and one of my friends shared this with me recently. Marriage is like a deck of cards, it begins with hearts and diamonds and ends with clubs and spades.

Unfortunately, so often this is true. I have studied and observed relationships for years and it seems we are happy to normalise and accept issues needing to be addressed and leave them as Elephants in the room. I have stopped using mankind as a generic definition for humans because I don't see the evidence of kindness between us.

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Everyday if you bother to watch the news or read the paper, we see the evidence of what they learned at sandpit University as 3 yr olds. We are still throwing sand in each other's faces as so-called adults, go figure?

I believe we have been created to monitor ourselves and view the many different curve balls thrown at us as litmus tests to how we respond. Which do you believe; life happens for you not to you? If it's to you then it becomes the heart of the victim mentality and continues to drive our finger pointing activities. If it's for you, then it becomes an opportunity to learn. How good is that?

When facing decisions about life and the great mentor that it is, we must learn how to be open hearted and teachable again. Our children can teach us this if we listen to their continuous why questions and watch how they learn by observing adults. They are like blotting paper absorbing everything about them!

Getting back to marriage relationships; if we have adopted the life happens for us model then when Elephants enter our room, it's a sign to us we have something to work on together. Each has a responsibility to address the issue and together we make the decisions to support each other through it.

Support is a whole subject of its own and needs to be highlighted. When we accept and embrace that life is about change, how open to be adjusted by our spouse are we? This is the time to recieve support from them to affect that change. Imagine how that would feel rather than being nitpicked?

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To My Spouse.com is an open invitation to the mystery of discovery.
There are 2 options for you to choose on the products page. One is writing to our spouse, the other a 7 day challenge Bridging The Gap is to assist couples struggling with their communication skills. I am preparing more economically priced courses, so watch this space.

Our spouse is a continuous mystery and humanity loves mystery, even if we don't admit it. Can you imagine life without mystery? We would be such boring people to be around and very ineffective, too.

Mystery gives birth to curiosity and adventure. Curve balls are part of it keeping us on our toes and the balls of our feet, pun intended! I am delightfully amazed when I meet a person who can use our beautiful language and play with it.

So many people should be bald because of the amount of stuff which goes over their heads 🙂

Come on humanity, wake up! Wake up to the mystery and solutions right in front of you and subscribe to life's adventures and grow some hair on your head.